My 600th post was last 2 weeks ago Wednesday. I meant to do something to mark it, but, it snuck* past me.
So, 600 posts.
____
Really, I didn't do anything to mark this, because I have just spent 30 minutes trying to decide if snuck is a real word, and if it is the past participle* of sneak, and if sneak has a past participle, and if I actually want to be using a past participle in this sentence.
Yes folks, I really am that cool.
____
*Because at least one of you would want to know, the OED indicates that snuck is an informal use of sneak, and the correct wording is "sneaked". Here indicates that sneaked/snuck are both the simple past and the past participle* form of the verb sneak, and I suspect, given that I am implying that the post snuck past me at a specific time last week, and does not continue to sneak past me now (although the post might be) I want the simple past, and not the past particle.
___
*And if you are still with me, and still interested, sneak a comment in the comments section, and I'll do a Wednesday's are for Grammar all about past tenses.
Showing posts with label Grammar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grammar. Show all posts
The Grave's a Fine and Private Place
But none I think, do there embrace. (1)
I made Mr. Spit a cupcake for Valentine's Day.
Delta ate it.
After I hunted through the bag of candy hearts to find the one that said "your awesome". (2)
Delta is not awesome.
(1) Andrew Marvel, To His Coy Mistress. The anti-love poem, but very, very funny.
(2) No, really it said that. No apostrophe. It was grammatically incorrect. The grammar lady bought grammatically incorrect valentine's candy.
Saturday's are for Grammar
No really, I found something better than a quote.
A Ph.D who explains the difference between which and that, and does it with diagrams.
Brilliant!
http://home.earthlink.net/~llica/wichthat.htm
A Ph.D who explains the difference between which and that, and does it with diagrams.
Brilliant!
http://home.earthlink.net/~llica/wichthat.htm
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Your Homework, such as it was, was to tell us all what is wrong with this sentence.
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."(Groucho Marx)
Those Who get the Coveted Grammar Button
Tash
Martha
Lisa DG
Sweet Camden Lass
JamieD
Heidi
The Shiny Red Pencil for Keeners
Now, I will grant class, that this was a hard button to assign. Only JamieD got the answer correct, and correctly identified the grammatical issue, using grammar words; however, she got the button last week. So, Jamie, you get to keep your button for an extra week, and Sweet Camden Lass, because you were both funny, and came very close to identifying the issue, you can have the keener button for this week.
The Lesson:
Martha, Lisa and Heidi suggested there were not enough commas in the sentence, which is a great start to solving the problem. It shows me you are thinking about how sentences read, which is an important part of figuring out if they are grammatically correct or not.
This sentence is actually my favourite form of mangling the English language. If you have to mangle a sentence, a misplaced modifier is the best way to do it. We can, at least, all laugh at the strange concoction that has come out of your mouth or pen.
So, if you will remember back into the recesses of earlier grammar lessons: when I talked about the roles of adverbs and adjectives, I said that an adjective modifies the noun, providing more information about the noun. An adverb on the other hand, provides more information about the verb. As a multipurpose word, it can also modify another phrase or clause.
Remembering 2 weeks ago, when I told you that sentences that aren't complete sentences are sentence fragments - we could also call them phrases or clauses.
In a sentence with a misplaced modifier, the adjective, the adverb, or the prepositional phrase is modifying the wrong part of the sentence or clause.
There are 3 types of misplaced modifiers:
1. Ambiguous placement
In this case, the modifying adjective, adverb or preposition is placed in such a way that it is not clear what it is modifying. Ambiguous placement very often involves words like: only, just, almost, hardly, nearly, merely, simply, even, scarcely, exactly.
One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."(Groucho Marx)
Those Who get the Coveted Grammar Button
Tash
Martha
Lisa DG
Sweet Camden Lass
JamieD
Heidi
The Shiny Red Pencil for Keeners
Now, I will grant class, that this was a hard button to assign. Only JamieD got the answer correct, and correctly identified the grammatical issue, using grammar words; however, she got the button last week. So, Jamie, you get to keep your button for an extra week, and Sweet Camden Lass, because you were both funny, and came very close to identifying the issue, you can have the keener button for this week.
The Lesson:
Martha, Lisa and Heidi suggested there were not enough commas in the sentence, which is a great start to solving the problem. It shows me you are thinking about how sentences read, which is an important part of figuring out if they are grammatically correct or not.
This sentence is actually my favourite form of mangling the English language. If you have to mangle a sentence, a misplaced modifier is the best way to do it. We can, at least, all laugh at the strange concoction that has come out of your mouth or pen.
So, if you will remember back into the recesses of earlier grammar lessons: when I talked about the roles of adverbs and adjectives, I said that an adjective modifies the noun, providing more information about the noun. An adverb on the other hand, provides more information about the verb. As a multipurpose word, it can also modify another phrase or clause.
Remembering 2 weeks ago, when I told you that sentences that aren't complete sentences are sentence fragments - we could also call them phrases or clauses.
In a sentence with a misplaced modifier, the adjective, the adverb, or the prepositional phrase is modifying the wrong part of the sentence or clause.
There are 3 types of misplaced modifiers:
1. Ambiguous placement
In this case, the modifying adjective, adverb or preposition is placed in such a way that it is not clear what it is modifying. Ambiguous placement very often involves words like: only, just, almost, hardly, nearly, merely, simply, even, scarcely, exactly.
Consider the following example, and how changing the word only affects the entire meaning of the sentence.
Only knitters say that good quality wool matters in the quality of the finished garment.
Knitters say only that good quality wool matters in the quality of the finished garment.
Knitters say that only good quality wool matters in the quality of the finished garment.
Knitters say that good quality wool only matters in the quality of the finished garment.
When a modifier is placed in such a way that it could cause a person to question whether or not the it modifies the information before or after the modifier, that is called a Squinting modifier.
2. Wrong Placement
In this case, the modifying adverbs, adjectives or prepositions are misplaced in the sentence, resulting in utter gibberish. Which is what happened to Mr. Marx, who suddenly, by grammatical accident, found himself shooting an elephant; likely after discovering that the elephant had stolen his PJ's.
3. Awkward Placement
Split Infinitives
An infinitive is a verb that requires the form "to verb". Examples include to convince, to create. When you split the to and the verb, confusion ensues.
Knitters managed to, on June 13, 2008, convene on the world, for World Wide Knit in public day.
Now, this isn't a hard and fast rule. Anyone here remember Star Trek? To boldly go? Now, how should that be written - that's right, it should be "to go boldly", which doesn't have quite the same ring to it. . .
Splitting Verb Phrases or Compounds
I have to put this in, because it's a rule. People get very worked up about this. So, here we go: a verb phrase is a group of words that function as a verb. Examples include things like "was kissed", "had been kissed". When you split these phrases up, it's hard to make sense of the sentence. As my grammar book phrases it, the sentence lurches forward.
Mrs. Spit had, in a most delightful way, been kissed. (This sentence is wrong. I had to look at three times to determine that I was splitting my verb compound. It's wrong. It still looks fine, doesn't it?) Correctly, it is written:
Mrs. Spit had been kissed in a most delightful way. (Because that looks so much better, doesn't it?Pbfft)
Your Homework:
A prominent public person has read this sentence in a speech. Clearly, he has not read my grammar column. (Or, possibly any other grammar column). See if you can fix the sentence and help a politician out.
"We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House - make no mistake about it."*
*You can also send your responses to: The White House, 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW, Washington, DC, 20500
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Your Homework:
Was to create a sentence that wasn't a sentence, merely a fragment.
Those who Did their Homework:
- Heidi
- Antigone
- Martha
- Sweet Camden Lass
- Lisa DG
The Shiny Red Pencil Award
Goes to JamieD, who made me smile with her existential angst.
A reminder: The button is only good for a week. No homework, no button. Put the button up illegitimately, and your car will begin to make popcorn in the radiator, your sink will shriek your ex-boyfriend's name every time you brush your teeth, and your cauliflower will begin broadcasting, from your fridge, to Alpha Centauri.
The Lesson This Week
Is only composed of homework.
Can you tell me what is wrong with this sentence:
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."(Groucho Marx)
Was to create a sentence that wasn't a sentence, merely a fragment.
Those who Did their Homework:
- Heidi
- Antigone
- Martha
- Sweet Camden Lass
- Lisa DG
The Shiny Red Pencil Award
Goes to JamieD, who made me smile with her existential angst.
A reminder: The button is only good for a week. No homework, no button. Put the button up illegitimately, and your car will begin to make popcorn in the radiator, your sink will shriek your ex-boyfriend's name every time you brush your teeth, and your cauliflower will begin broadcasting, from your fridge, to Alpha Centauri.
The Lesson This Week
Is only composed of homework.
Can you tell me what is wrong with this sentence:
"One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know."(Groucho Marx)
Wednesday's are for Grammar (What Makes a Sentence)
Last Week's Homework:
Your assignment was to write me a sentence that completely violated all of the correct rules of capitalization. I really enjoyed reading your sentences. You made me laugh out loud!
Those who get to post the good grammar button:
Alice
Julia S
Carmen
LoriBeth
JamieD
And the Shiny Red Pencil for Keeners:
Ahh, this was a hard decision.
Should I give it to Alice, who rhymes. . .
Julia S, who can totally use some love.
Carmen who is new. . .
LoriBeth, who has the same rant about capitalization that I do. .
or
Martha, who not only did her homework, but has bribed the teacher with chocolate. She's kind of a floozy that way (The teacher not Martha).
A stern reminder: Your grammar button is only good for one week. Keep the button up longer and your broccoli will grow roots and fraternize with your potatoes, strange little fish will come to inhabit your toilet bowl and your car will only make left turns. Honest.
This Week's Lesson:
Ahh, dear readers, what makes a sentence? A capital letter at one end, and a period at the other?
No.
A million times no.
Absolutely Not!
Now, all of you will have read the entry on subjects and predicates, no? What do you mean you haven't? Well, go read it.
Now, do try to keep up.
So, you will remember that all sentences have a subject and a predicate. What else can we say about a sentence: It should be able to stand alone.
What happens when we have sentences that can't stand alone? We have a sentence fragment.
Test Number 1
Want a quick test? Ask yourself, does this sentence have a verb and a subject? Very often when we read a fragment, we are left reading the sentence, saying "and. . .?" Consider the following sentence.
The purple knitting needles.
Well, what about them? It's great that there are purple knitting needles, but we don't have them doing anything, they are lacking a verb. Alternatively, we could have this sentence:
Knitting really fast.
Notice anything? That's right. No subject.
No subject = no Sentence.
Test Number 2:
One final test - does the sentence start with a dependent clause:
Your assignment was to write me a sentence that completely violated all of the correct rules of capitalization. I really enjoyed reading your sentences. You made me laugh out loud!
Those who get to post the good grammar button:
Alice
Julia S
Carmen
LoriBeth
JamieD
And the Shiny Red Pencil for Keeners:
Ahh, this was a hard decision.
Should I give it to Alice, who rhymes. . .
Julia S, who can totally use some love.
Carmen who is new. . .
LoriBeth, who has the same rant about capitalization that I do. .
or
Martha, who not only did her homework, but has bribed the teacher with chocolate. She's kind of a floozy that way (The teacher not Martha).
A stern reminder: Your grammar button is only good for one week. Keep the button up longer and your broccoli will grow roots and fraternize with your potatoes, strange little fish will come to inhabit your toilet bowl and your car will only make left turns. Honest.
This Week's Lesson:
Ahh, dear readers, what makes a sentence? A capital letter at one end, and a period at the other?
No.
A million times no.
Absolutely Not!
Now, all of you will have read the entry on subjects and predicates, no? What do you mean you haven't? Well, go read it.
Now, do try to keep up.
So, you will remember that all sentences have a subject and a predicate. What else can we say about a sentence: It should be able to stand alone.
What happens when we have sentences that can't stand alone? We have a sentence fragment.
Test Number 1
Want a quick test? Ask yourself, does this sentence have a verb and a subject? Very often when we read a fragment, we are left reading the sentence, saying "and. . .?" Consider the following sentence.
The purple knitting needles.
Well, what about them? It's great that there are purple knitting needles, but we don't have them doing anything, they are lacking a verb. Alternatively, we could have this sentence:
Knitting really fast.
Notice anything? That's right. No subject.
No subject = no Sentence.
Test Number 2:
One final test - does the sentence start with a dependent clause:
- After
- although
- as
- because
- before
- even though
- if
- since
- though
- unless
- until
- when
- whenever
- where
- wherever
Your Homework:
See if you can find me an example of a sentence fragment that is masquerading as a sentence.
Wendesday's are for Grammar (Capitalization)
Last Week's Homework:
JamieD
Heather
Here are the corrected sentences. (The misspelling of grammarian was my mistake. As was the bizarre apostrophe in Mrs. Spit. Not sure where my brain was, sorry.)
There is a challenge in talking about grammar, and the way that people use it badly; one must make some sort of judgment about the person, who is, or is not using standard grammar. We necessarily make some sort of judgment about their intelligence, and possibly, their social standing. I prefer to assume that those who use poor grammar are ignorant, in the classical sense of the world. Not meaning rude or primitive, but unschooled, not knowing better. I am sure that they would like to do better.
The other challenge with English grammar is that standards of correctness vary. From time and country to the text book or style manual that you use. In my professional life, our style guide for writing often requires me to stretch the bounds of good English, to almost a breaking point. I have seen some awful mistakes and really bad wording.
Many of you have emailed me, from time to time, to ask me a particular grammar question. And I'm always happy to give answers. Really. But, sometimes, the questions are grey - it really is a matter of preference, or what country you live in. What Sam in the UK would find appalling, we would find quite normal. Sometimes you have to lay your expectations down.
So, with those provisos, I offer Mrs. Spit’s Grammarian Guide to Making Yourself Sound all Intelligent-like and making fewer mistakes.
The other challenge with English grammar is that standards of correctness vary. From time and country to the text book or style manual that you use. In my professional life, our style guide for writing often requires me to stretch the bounds of good English, to almost a breaking point. I have seen some awful mistakes and really bad wording.
Many of you have emailed me, from time to time, to ask me a particular grammar question. And I'm always happy to give answers. Really. But, sometimes, the questions are grey - it really is a matter of preference, or what country you live in. What Sam in the UK would find appalling, we would find quite normal. Sometimes you have to lay your expectations down.
So, with those provisos, I offer Mrs. Spit’s Grammarian Guide to Making Yourself Sound all Intelligent-like and making fewer mistakes.
Those who Get to Post The Coveted Button
JamieDHeather
Martha
Excavator
Mr. Spit (Who is a first time participant, also!)
Geohede
Sweet Camden Lass
Beth
Dreams Come True
And today, Ladies (and gentleman!) We announce a new, special prize. Especially for keeners, those that go above and beyond the homework, find silly mistakes of mine, charm me with compliments, or type such an amusing answer, I can't help but laugh.
Ladies (and gentleman!), may I pronounce, The Shiny Red Pencil, For Keeners.
This week, we are giving the award to Schlup. Who did not actually do the homework, but did point out that I used a grocer's apostrophe in provisos. We all remember that grocer's apostrophes are bad, don't we now?
A firm reminder, buttons are only good for one week. Keep it on your blog longer, and your finger nails will turn black, your toilet will fill with blue goo, and your car tires will turn to mush.
This Week's Lesson: Capitalization
I must confess, this lesson was supposed to be about what a complete sentence is, but as I was meeting an old friend for a cup of tea, I came across a sign with the most random of capitalization. It truly irked me. Alas, it was behind glass, so I couldn't haul out my trusty red sharpie, and begin correcting. Here's when we capitalize:
1. The first word of a sentence
Mrs. Spit is not a fan of random capitalization.
2. Items in a list, where each item makes a complete sentence.
There were three reasons for Mrs. Spit's knitting failure. (1) She picked a pattern with a number of errors. (2) She lost her knitting needles. (3) Mr. Spit continually bothered her to go play Wii tennis.
We would NOT capitalize the following list, because the items in the list are not complete sentences
Mrs. Spit bought wool, knitting needles and a pattern.
3. Capitalize the first letter of a quotation.
Capitalize the letter even if the words preceding the quote don't make a complete sentence. Do not capitalize the remainder of the quote, if you have broken it up in the sentence.
"Dear", Mr. Spit said, "we noticed that you have bought more wool?".
4. Capitalize the pronoun I.
I cannot tell you how obnoxious it is when people do not do this. I might perhaps accept it from a 12 year old girl, it is completely unacceptable in adults, and renders your writing to be illegible gibberish. Readers are trained to expect certain words to be capitalized. Play along with society's expectations in this case.
Dear Reader, do I really need to give you an example of this?
5. Capitalize proper nouns and proper adjectives.
Proper nouns are a specific person, place or thing - they are not at all general classes. Place names, people's names, that sort of thing. So, you wouldn't capitalize the word cat, but you would capitalize your cat's name.
Proper adjectives are derived from proper nouns. For example, a Japan is a proper noun, and Japanese literature, where the literature is the noun, and the adjective Japanese tells us about a particular type of literature, it describes the literature. Trademarks are also considered to be proper adjectives.
Mrs. Spit only buys Primo spaghetti sauce, Guiness beer and Scotty paper towels.
Proviso: Some brand names like Kleenex, Band-aids, Post-it Notes and the like have become so common place, that we don't use the capitalization for them, because they don't necessarily refer to a particular brand of goods, but refer to an entire class of goods. This makes them just an ordinary adjective. Yes, I know, the makers of the goods likely don't like this rule, but there you have it.
6. The random capitalization for effect.
Ah, Dear Reader, this gets confusing. Mrs. Spit has no problems with using grammar for style. She's actually quite a fan. But, there's a difference between style and not knowing what you are doing. Do this insensibly and you will look like a pretentious git. Here are her rules to try to bring some order to the unordered.
- Be consistent. If you are going to capitalize a word in a piece of writing that would not usually be capitalized, do so consistently in the entire piece of writing.
- Use this sparingly. There's nothing worse than seeing higgledy-piggledy capitalization. Perhaps it would help if you imagined a reader moving their eyes along the screen. When they come to a capitalized item, their head moves upward. Now dear reader, I want you to imagine what it would look like if their head was bobbing up and down. Yes Dear Reader, you get the picture.
- Do not, under any circumstances, randomly capitalize prepositions or conjunctions. I assure you, Dear Reader, there is no reason to give particular importance to the words "of" or "to" or "and".
Your Homework:
Write me a sentence that utterly violates every rule of capitalization. Wednesday's are For Grammar (Sound Smarter)
Grammar is the logic of speech, even as logic is the grammar of reason. ~Richard C. Trench
Those Who Get to Display the Button
- Sweet Camden Lass
- Martha
- Julia S
- Two Hands
- JamieD
- Alice (Alice, you should be able to right click, save the picture and put it in your blog that way)
- Elizabeth
There is a challenge in talking about grammar, and the way that people use it badly; one must make some sort of judgment about the person, whom is, or is not using standard grammar. We necessarily make some sort of judgment about their intelligence, and possibly, their social standing. I prefer to assume that those who use poor grammar are ignorant, in the classical sense of the world. Not meaning rude or primitive, but unschooled, not knowing better. I, myself are sure that they would like too do better.
The other challenge with English grammar is that standards of correctness vary, from time and country too the text book or style manual that you use. In my professional life, our style guide for writing often requires me to stretch the bounds of good English, two almost a breaking point. I seen some awful mistakes and really bad wording.
Many of you have emailed me to ask me a particular grammar question. And I'm always happy to give answers. Really. But, sometimes, the questions are grey - it really is a matter of preference. Or what country you live in. What Sam or Sweet Camden Lass in the UK would find appalling, we would find quite normal. Sometimes you have to lie your expectations down.
So, with those proviso’s, I offer Mrs. Spit'ts Grammerian Guide to Making Yourself Sound all Intelligent-like and making less mistakes.
Is and Are (and Am)
Is, Are and Am are conjugations of the verb to be. Blogger, in it's stubbornness doesn't let me show you a table, so here's my best approximation.
I am a blogger (First person, singular)
You are a blogger (Second person, singular)
S/He is a blogger (Third person, singular)
It is a blogger (and likely a troll, we don't use 'it' to refer to people.)
We are bloggers (First person, plural)
They are bloggers (Third person, plural)
So, the rules for this conjugation:
'I' takes the form 'am', it's singular in the sense that it refers to one person, speaking of them self.
He, She, and It take the form is, it's singular in the sense that it refers to one person, that we are speaking of.
We takes the form are, it's plural, and we are talking about ourselves and at least one other person.
They takes the form are, it's plural and we are talking about other people.
You is an interesting case. A remnant in the English language, from the Latin, that had two forms of 'you' - Thee (for people you were familiar with) and Thou (for everyone else). It's the only remnant of the second person singular, and you will just have to remember, we use are with you, NOT is.
Who and Whom
Can I confess - I hate who and whom. I always have to think about which one to use. I think, eventually, the archaic whom will go away, and we will use only who. Until that blessed day, here's how to tell the difference.
Who and Whom are actually pronouns.
If you can replace the who with he, she or they, you are using who correctly.
If you can replace the whom with him, her or them, you are using correctly.
Alright, a few examples.
Mrs. Spit gave us a grammar lesson. Who gave you a grammar lesson? (You could replace Mrs. Spit with she, so you use who)
Did you see Mrs. Spit leave? Whom did you see leave? (You would replace Mrs. Spit with her, so you use whom)
I warn you, with this rule, significant re-jigging of sentences might be required. Sometimes it's easier to guess, you have a 50% chance. Just saying.
To, Too, and Two
Well, I get to and too mixed up a lot. Let's see if we can straighten us all out.
Two is a number. We use it when we are referring to a count noun - Mrs. Spit has two dogs. There are no excuses for getting this wrong. None. You get banished to grammar perdition if you mix up two with to or too.
To is a preposition. That means it describes the relationship of one thing to another.
She is going to bed.
She likes to knit.
Too is an adverb. (I know, an adverb that doesn't end in -ly. It's not fair!). Remember, an adverb modifies the verb. Or to make it much, much easier, if you are stuck, ask yourself, could I replace the too with words like "as well, also, excessively, likewise, overly." If so, you mean too.
See, Saw, Seen
Ahh, getting this wrong is very, very VERY likely to get you smacked in Mrs. Spit's house. I mean it, there is a special place in grammar perdition for those who use seen when they mean saw. This actually isn't conjugation, it's tense.
I see - Present tense. You are seeing this item right now.
I see that you are all committed to learning better grammar.
I saw - Past tense. You saw this in the past.
I saw Mrs. Spit knitting yesterday.
I have seen - Past participle. Past participles are a bit tricky to explain, without explaining verbal tenses. So, let me try it this way. Remember those auxiliary verbs we talked about? I'll make it very simple. When you are saying seen, you are saying that you did see something, in the indeterminate past. You need to add a helping verb so that your listener can figure out what you mean.
Do NOT ever use "seen" in a sentence without an auxiliary verb like "to have". I mean it, if I catch you saying "I seen that", I will completely lose it!
I have seen Mrs. Spit knitting.
Starting a sentence with a conjunction (And, But, Or, Not)
Ok class, how many of you remember a teacher telling you that you can't start a sentence with one of these words? I thought so. You can, but with some proviso's. Very often, when we start a sentence with 'and', we don't actually make a complete sentence. If you are going to start a sentence with a conjunction, you must make sure that you have a complete sentence.
I, Myself
Another thing that drives me crazy. This is wrong. You can start a sentence with I.
I like knitting.
Myself, on the other hand, is a reflexive pronoun. That means that you may only use "myself" when the subject of the sentence is the same as the person taking the action (the object).
You would say "I bought myself a present".
Do NOT say "I, myself bought a present". As opposed to you, the other person?
Count Nouns (Fewer and Less)
I went to a Trader Joe's in California. There was a sign about the check-out saying 12 items or fewer. I was irritated at first, but they are actually correct. Use:
Fewer for count nouns - things that can be counted - apples, cars, money.
I have 12 fewer knitting needles today.
Less for non-count nouns - things that cannot be counted, space, ideas, anything that can't be quantified in units.
I have done less knitting this year.
Proviso: In spite of this rule, we always use less for people. It's rude to count people as items. Don't ask why. It's just one of those odd-ball English things.
There are less people knitting now.
Lie or Lay
This is the easiest one to figure out. Let me introduce you to the chicken rule.
A chicken lays an egg, and then lies on them.
Lay: to place or set an object on something. Many verbs take an -ed ending in the past tense. Lay is different. Both the present and the past tense are lay. There is no such word as 'layed'.
Lie: to recline.
Mrs. Spit has a wee lie down every Saturday at 2 o'clock.
Mrs. Spit lay her knitting down on the chair.
Your Homework
I have made 9 deliberate mistakes in the first paragraphs of this post. See if you can find them all.
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Your Homework last week was to create a sentence with a dash, and ellipsis and brackets. I'm pleased to say that a number of you did well.
Who Gets to Post the Coveted Grammar Award Button
I was absolutely thrilled with the homework this week. I must give you all kudos. Not only did everyone use the marks correctly, but truly, reading them brought a huge smile to my face.
Without further ado, a big round of applause to:
- Sweet Camden Lass - who is very good at this.
- Martha - who writes quite well, don't listen to her protestations.
- Aunt Becky - who has never done her homework before. A special round of appluase for not being such a slacker.
- JamieD and JuliaS who always do their homework.
- Carbon - who doesn't like parenthesis in conversation.
- Tash, who has, quite possibly the jerkiest ex in all creation
- Two Hands (who called me charming!)
- Alice - who rhymes. And is funny. And Charming. And used another language in her sentence!
A reminder. If you don't do the button and you keep it up on your blog, your hair will turn green, your tomatoes will explode in your garden and your back bumper will fall off at a traffic light. I mean it!
This Week's Lesson:
Ahh, the time has come dear readers. I'm afraid we must discuss that most awe inspiring mark, the apostrophe. I know that you don't like them. Although, I must say I find the fact that there is a campaign to ban the apostrophe a titch distressing. Surely there are more pressing issues at hand? (1)
Apostrophe's are actually important, with 3 main uses.
1. To indicate that a noun or a pronoun is possessive.
This part gets a bad rap, only because no one can ever figure out where to add the apostrophe if there's an S. Everyone is disconcerted. Here are the rules. Write them on your hand until you memorize them.
a. When the noun or pronoun does not end in 's', use 's to show possession.
Mrs. Spit's knitting. (the knitting, belonging to Mrs. Spit)
b. When the noun or pronoun ends in 's', add another 's to the word.
The bus's passengers were completely bored with nothing to knit.
c. When a plural noun (already more than one) ends in 's', use only the apostrophe. Truly this seems to screw people up. What the rule means is this. If you already have more than one thing, don't add another s. That would be a plural of a plural. If you add the apostrophe before the 's', there can only be one of the noun. A plural is denoted by the 's'.
The boys' bicycles were run over by Mrs. Spit's car. (note this, there are several boys, but only one Mrs. Spit)
d. Add the apostrophe and the s to end of a compound word. (2)
The Thursday-Whinge-For-All's prize is a scarf this month. (3)
e. Where there is individual possession, each person owning the noun or pronoun in the sentence, they each get an 's to indicate the ownership is separate.
Mrs. Spit's and Mr. Spit's pets are not always well behaved. (4)
f. In join possession, only use one 's at the end of the nouns or pronouns in the sentence.
Mr. and Mrs. Spit's fridge smells really bad.
2. Apostrophe's are used to indicate that letters have been omitted from a word. These words are called contractions. Contractions are generally informal, and should be spelled out in formal language. (5)
Mrs. Spit can't go, she has too much weeding in her garden.
3. Use an apostrophe to form plurals of individual letters of words, numbers or symbols.
Mrs. Spit has a lot of S's in her name.
Yes, that's right. My phone number is 444-4444 - there are seven 4's.
Important Note on the Grocer's apostrophe.
For some peculiar reason, writers assume that if they are identifying single nouns, they should follow this rule. Accordingly my grocery store is notorious for having:
Pear's, .79 cents/pound.
Now, we know that we aren't forming plurals of a single number or letter, so that's not why they are using the apostrophe. Surely there are no letters missing, which means that the store seems to be indicating that the pear's belong to someone or something else. Now, this is concerning. If the pears belong to another, really whom do they belong too, and should you be selling them if you don't legitimately own them?
Your Homework:
Now that you know better, your mission is to identify an abused apostrophe in the comments section of the blog. Bonus points if you take a writing implement and fix it then and there. (6) Yes, you can use the English Fail Blog or the like, but if you do, you have to identify why the mark is wrong. People finding examples in real life may merely leave me the details in the comments, or email me a picture, to be posted on next week's blog entry.
*****
(1) All is not lost. There is also a society to protect the poor wee mark. They have t-shirts. They could likely use the money from the sales to further their work. Just a hint. (Likely a 2xl please)
(2) Alas, hardly anyone uses compound words any more.
(3) No really, it is. Looks lovely.
(4) It's hard to think of an example in this case. This is a terribly awkward sentence construction, it's not often used.
(5) And I don't care where you are, Ain't isn't a word! Ever! Under any circumstances! Even if you are the President of the United States, you sound like a fool if you use ain't!
(6) But don't get yourself arrested. That would just look bad.
Who Gets to Post the Coveted Grammar Award Button
I was absolutely thrilled with the homework this week. I must give you all kudos. Not only did everyone use the marks correctly, but truly, reading them brought a huge smile to my face.
Without further ado, a big round of applause to:
- Sweet Camden Lass - who is very good at this.
- Martha - who writes quite well, don't listen to her protestations.
- Aunt Becky - who has never done her homework before. A special round of appluase for not being such a slacker.
- JamieD and JuliaS who always do their homework.
- Carbon - who doesn't like parenthesis in conversation.
- Tash, who has, quite possibly the jerkiest ex in all creation
- Two Hands (who called me charming!)
- Alice - who rhymes. And is funny. And Charming. And used another language in her sentence!
A reminder. If you don't do the button and you keep it up on your blog, your hair will turn green, your tomatoes will explode in your garden and your back bumper will fall off at a traffic light. I mean it!
This Week's Lesson:
Ahh, the time has come dear readers. I'm afraid we must discuss that most awe inspiring mark, the apostrophe. I know that you don't like them. Although, I must say I find the fact that there is a campaign to ban the apostrophe a titch distressing. Surely there are more pressing issues at hand? (1)
Apostrophe's are actually important, with 3 main uses.
1. To indicate that a noun or a pronoun is possessive.
This part gets a bad rap, only because no one can ever figure out where to add the apostrophe if there's an S. Everyone is disconcerted. Here are the rules. Write them on your hand until you memorize them.
a. When the noun or pronoun does not end in 's', use 's to show possession.
Mrs. Spit's knitting. (the knitting, belonging to Mrs. Spit)
b. When the noun or pronoun ends in 's', add another 's to the word.
The bus's passengers were completely bored with nothing to knit.
c. When a plural noun (already more than one) ends in 's', use only the apostrophe. Truly this seems to screw people up. What the rule means is this. If you already have more than one thing, don't add another s. That would be a plural of a plural. If you add the apostrophe before the 's', there can only be one of the noun. A plural is denoted by the 's'.
The boys' bicycles were run over by Mrs. Spit's car. (note this, there are several boys, but only one Mrs. Spit)
d. Add the apostrophe and the s to end of a compound word. (2)
The Thursday-Whinge-For-All's prize is a scarf this month. (3)
e. Where there is individual possession, each person owning the noun or pronoun in the sentence, they each get an 's to indicate the ownership is separate.
Mrs. Spit's and Mr. Spit's pets are not always well behaved. (4)
f. In join possession, only use one 's at the end of the nouns or pronouns in the sentence.
Mr. and Mrs. Spit's fridge smells really bad.
2. Apostrophe's are used to indicate that letters have been omitted from a word. These words are called contractions. Contractions are generally informal, and should be spelled out in formal language. (5)
Mrs. Spit can't go, she has too much weeding in her garden.
3. Use an apostrophe to form plurals of individual letters of words, numbers or symbols.
Mrs. Spit has a lot of S's in her name.
Yes, that's right. My phone number is 444-4444 - there are seven 4's.
Important Note on the Grocer's apostrophe.
For some peculiar reason, writers assume that if they are identifying single nouns, they should follow this rule. Accordingly my grocery store is notorious for having:
Pear's, .79 cents/pound.
Now, we know that we aren't forming plurals of a single number or letter, so that's not why they are using the apostrophe. Surely there are no letters missing, which means that the store seems to be indicating that the pear's belong to someone or something else. Now, this is concerning. If the pears belong to another, really whom do they belong too, and should you be selling them if you don't legitimately own them?
Your Homework:
Now that you know better, your mission is to identify an abused apostrophe in the comments section of the blog. Bonus points if you take a writing implement and fix it then and there. (6) Yes, you can use the English Fail Blog or the like, but if you do, you have to identify why the mark is wrong. People finding examples in real life may merely leave me the details in the comments, or email me a picture, to be posted on next week's blog entry.
*****
(1) All is not lost. There is also a society to protect the poor wee mark. They have t-shirts. They could likely use the money from the sales to further their work. Just a hint. (Likely a 2xl please)
(2) Alas, hardly anyone uses compound words any more.
(3) No really, it is. Looks lovely.
(4) It's hard to think of an example in this case. This is a terribly awkward sentence construction, it's not often used.
(5) And I don't care where you are, Ain't isn't a word! Ever! Under any circumstances! Even if you are the President of the United States, you sound like a fool if you use ain't!
(6) But don't get yourself arrested. That would just look bad.
Wednesday's are for Grammar (Soft Marks)
Right then class, last week your homework was to properly punctuate this sentence. Here it is, correctly done.
"What", cried Mr. Spit. "You bought more wool. How could you? You have mounds, great piles mountains, of the stuff." I smugly thought to myself, I have lots more knitting to do, essential knitting, that must be done. Knitting for: babies, for husbands, for winners of Whinge-For-All Thursdays. Amazing knitting that everyone will treasure!
Those Who Get to Post the Coveted Grammar Button
Two Hands (and I believe this is the first time she has participated, so she gets extra points)
Dreams come true ( a frequent participant)
Sweet Camden Lass (a dedicated grammar maven)
JuliaS (who just all around rocks)
Honourable Mention to Niobe, who agrees with me that some grammar rules are just dumb.
And the rest of you were where? Really, this was pathetic participation.
And the friendly reminder that no homework = no button. If you keep the button up past the week, your toes will develop an obscure and uncomfortable fungus, your potatoes will all be green and your car will belch purple smoke. I promise!
This Week's Lesson
All that is left is the rest of G.V. Carey's lighter marks.
"What", cried Mr. Spit. "You bought more wool. How could you? You have mounds, great piles mountains, of the stuff." I smugly thought to myself, I have lots more knitting to do, essential knitting, that must be done. Knitting for: babies, for husbands, for winners of Whinge-For-All Thursdays. Amazing knitting that everyone will treasure!
Those Who Get to Post the Coveted Grammar Button
Two Hands (and I believe this is the first time she has participated, so she gets extra points)
Dreams come true ( a frequent participant)
Sweet Camden Lass (a dedicated grammar maven)
JuliaS (who just all around rocks)
Honourable Mention to Niobe, who agrees with me that some grammar rules are just dumb.
And the rest of you were where? Really, this was pathetic participation.
And the friendly reminder that no homework = no button. If you keep the button up past the week, your toes will develop an obscure and uncomfortable fungus, your potatoes will all be green and your car will belch purple smoke. I promise!
This Week's Lesson
All that is left is the rest of G.V. Carey's lighter marks.
- Brackets and Parentheses
- Ellipsis
- Dashes
This is a nice short lesson, so let's get right into it.
Brackets and Parentheses
There are actually two forms - used for slightly different purposes.
A parentheses is the curvy thing looks like this ( ). We use parentheses in the following situations:
1. To enclose additional information or explanations and examples. Many of you will notice that you could also use a set of commas. Parentheses are sometimes helpful when the explanation will be long, or when the sentence looks confusing with even more commas.
Mrs. Spit (the celebrated knitter) could teach you to knit lace.
Mrs. Spit knit a beautiful shawl for Cathy (her midwife).
2.To cite chapter and verse, especially in legislation, reports, contracts or court decisions, and to annotate lists in documents.
Section 22, paragraph 12, clause g is often abbreviated 22.12(g)
3. To enclose a number that is repeating a spelled-out number. This is often used in business documents, or when you want to be really clear that yes, Mr. Spit should buy five (yes, 5) pounds of butter.
That wool will cost sixty-five dollars ($65).
We will need to order thirty-five (35) skeins of wool for this project.
4. To enclose a question mark, when you are not sure of the truth of a number or date. (1). This is not an excuse to not check your facts. But, when you are not sure if information is correct, it's worth noting it.
I think Mr. Spit was born on October 21(?), 1972(2)
Brackets - perhaps it would be most helpful to think of brackets [ ] as an editorial device. Consider the following uses:
1. To insert missing text or vital information into a quote. This is where you have had to make alterations to a quote to make it fit a sentence, or where you have had to omit a significant amount of text and are truncating. It always bears repeating that you should not use square brackets to alter the intent of the quote, and when you see them in a sentence, you should be curious about what was omitted. (3)
"Wow", the Yarn Harlot said. "[You're] an amazing knitter."
2. To let your reader know that you have added italics for emphasis in a quote.
Mrs. Spit responded "My husband is a wonderful, kind, loving and fun man. Don't you dare talk about him that way. I shall claw your eyeballs out." [bold mine]
3. To let your reader know that a mistake in the quoted material is not yours.(4)
"She always did insist that her husband waz onlee 32" [sic]
Ellipsis
1. An ellipsis shows that you have left words out of a sentence or quoted material. When the material we are leaving out starts the sentence, we don't use an ellipsis. We also don't use an ellipsis when the quoted material left out is a complete sentence.
"Mrs. Spit . . . an amazing knitter, is likely to knit all sorts of things."
2. An ellipsis shows that you have 'trailed off' in a sentence. It's a stylistic tool that invites the reader to fill in the blank or draw their own conclusion.
"Knitting relaxes me. I should probably do more of it . . . "
Dashes
1. We use dashes to emphasize an aside in a sentence. (5)
Mrs. Spit - the celebrated knitter - is knitting a shawl.
2. We use dashes to emphasize explanations, examples, and definitions.
I am going to see Mr. Spit - my husband - for dinner tonight.
3. To emphasize a contrast in a sentence.
Mrs. Spit, who is very organized - looked very disheveled.
4. Use a dash to show hesitant or broken-off speech.
Umm - ah - well, I stuttered. I'm not sure how I spent that much in the wool store.
Your Homework
Write a sentence with a set of brackets or parentheses, an ellipsis and a dash.
******
(1) We do not use a question mark in parenthesis when we aren't sure of the spelling. We go and get a dictionary and look the word up, if we aren't sure of its spelling.
(2) Errm, this is less of a joke than you might think. I have a hard time remembering Mr. Spit's birthday. I write it down each year.
(3) Especially when viewing quotes from politicians!(4) I must confess, that when quoting those who annoy me, I take great delight in going through all their material, and sticking [sic] in wherever I can.
(5) Grammar Geek Speak - this is called an appositive. Remember those from the comma lesson? The one I called the non-essential comma?
Wednesday's are for Grammar
All right then. Your homework was to punctuate this sentence.
I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials i need milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project dear Mr Spit said did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors
Punctuated correctly, it should look something like:
"I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials. I need: milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project." "Dear," Mr Spit said, "did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere? Safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors!"
A number of you changed the sentence to be "Dear Mr. Spit", and he will tell you that there's a good reason he likes you!
Who Gets to Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award?
Well, blogger ate homework this week.
I remember that Excavator, Julia, Alicia, Antigone and Sweet Camden Lass participated. I think there were others. If you did legitimately do your homework, please post your award.
I also got re-submitted homework from
-JuliaS, Julia, JamieD and Sweet Camden Lass.
A stern reminder - no homework, no button. If you don't do your homework, your house will be overrun by moose, Canadian geese will poop in your shoes and the left indicator light in your vehicle will cease to work. I promise.
This Week's Lesson
Ah, this week, we get to talk about what G.V. Carey calls "The Soft Punctuation Marks". This is a short lesson, most punctuation marks just aren't that cuddly. Now, there are a few cuddly, soft punctuation marks, but the most important of all (arguably the most important mark, period!) is the comma, so the comma will comprise an entire lesson. (I hate to tell you - the apostrophe will get it's own lesson too!)
I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials i need milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project dear Mr Spit said did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors
Punctuated correctly, it should look something like:
"I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials. I need: milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project." "Dear," Mr Spit said, "did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere? Safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors!"
A number of you changed the sentence to be "Dear Mr. Spit", and he will tell you that there's a good reason he likes you!
Who Gets to Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award?
Well, blogger ate homework this week.
I remember that Excavator, Julia, Alicia, Antigone and Sweet Camden Lass participated. I think there were others. If you did legitimately do your homework, please post your award.
I also got re-submitted homework from
-JuliaS, Julia, JamieD and Sweet Camden Lass.
A stern reminder - no homework, no button. If you don't do your homework, your house will be overrun by moose, Canadian geese will poop in your shoes and the left indicator light in your vehicle will cease to work. I promise.
This Week's Lesson
Ah, this week, we get to talk about what G.V. Carey calls "The Soft Punctuation Marks". This is a short lesson, most punctuation marks just aren't that cuddly. Now, there are a few cuddly, soft punctuation marks, but the most important of all (arguably the most important mark, period!) is the comma, so the comma will comprise an entire lesson. (I hate to tell you - the apostrophe will get it's own lesson too!)
The Comma
A comma is a humble mark, but oh, so important. Upon its misplacement, Lynn Truss wrote an entire book, and spurred a grammatical revolution. Don't believe me? Consider the following joke:
A panda walks into a bar. She orders a beer and wings, drinks the beer, eats the wings, draws a gun and fires two shots in the air.
"Why?" asks the confused bartender, as the panda makes her way towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over her shoulder.
"I'm a panda", she says. "Look it up".
The bartender turns to the relevant entry and, sure enough, finds an explanation.
"Panda. Large black and white bear like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."(1)
Important places to put the comma:
Between And, Or, But, For, Not, Yet. (2)
A co-ordinating conjunction can link two independent clauses to create a compound sentence.
Mrs.Spit was ominously quiet, so her knitting was not going well.
After an introductory phrase or an interjection.
Mrs. Spit, please stop talking.
To satisfy a craving for ice cream, Mrs. Spit drove to Marble Slab.
To separate 3 or more items in a series, or in a list.
Mrs. Spit adores: wool, cashmere, alpaca, silk and mercerized cotton.
Comma Caution(3)
Some people would punctuate this sentence as ". . . silk, and mercerized cotton". This is called an Oxford comma, and is not common in North America. It's not incorrect, but not commonly done. Mrs. Spit tends to believe that unless you were actually educated at Oxford, you shouldn't do this.
To separate adjectives in a sentence
Mr. Spit thinks Mrs. Spit is lovely, wonderful and a great cook.
Comma Caution:
In order to legitimately separate adjectives, the adjectives need to operate independently(4). This means that you can place a co-ordinating conjunction between them, move their order around or remove one, and the sentence will still make sense. In the above example I could have written lovely and wonderful and a great cook, I could move their order around, or even remove one, and the sentence would still work. Try it for yourself.
To Set Off a Non-Essential Element in a sentence
You use a comma if you are putting a bit of information in a sentence, but this information doesn't change the meaning of the sentence. You could take it out, and no one would notice. It's like a conversational aside. Place the comma's on either side of the non-essential element, to set it off.
Mrs. Spit, a celebrated hostess, is a great knitter.
To Set off Quoted Material
Use a comma to help your reader pause before reading quoted material.(5)
"Wherefore art Mrs. Spit", cried Mr. Spit.
In Dates, Numbers, Addresses
Between the month and year
In large numbers
Between the city and the province. You get the picture.
The General, All Purpose Comma
This is sort of an odd-duck. Sometimes sentences just don't make sense. I would urge you to re-write the sentence, try to break it up, make sure that you haven't misplaced or dangled your modifiers, that sort of thing. But, sometimes there is just nothing to do but throw a few commas in.(6)
Your Homework:
Yep, you saw it coming. Put comma's in the following paragraph.
"What" cried Mr. Spit. "You bought more wool. How could you? You have mounds great piles mountains of the stuff." I smugly thought to myself I have lots more knitting to do essential knitting that must be done. Knitting for babies for husbands for winners of Whinge-For-All Thursdays. Amazing knitting that everyone will treasure!
****
(1) The panda says No! You'll get it if you read the book.
(2) Geeky Grammar Speak - before a co-ordinating conjunction that links independent clauses
(3) Troyka's book on Grammar (Out of print, sorry) helpfully comes up with this term to help writers avoid panda-sized fatalities.
(4) More Geeky Grammar Speak - these are technically called co-ordinate adjectives.
(5) I think this is the dumbest rule. That's why we have quotation marks. So, you know, we know that someone else is speaking. Alas, I am not the final arbitrator of comma use. But when I rule the world . . .
(6) No, I can't give you an example. I *always* write well!
Bad Blogger (Wednesday's are for Grammar!)
Blogger ate the grammar post. Grammar haters! If you did your homework, unfortunately, Blogger ate it. I'm sure it's very sorry.
Well everyone, your homework was to decide and make a good case for whether or not this sentence was punctuated correctly.
The correct answer is "was".
There were two big giveaways to this question. Firstly, I told you that I wasn't pregnant. Which meant that this was an indicative mood - a case of either or. Because you knew my state, you knew that I wasn't pregnant. Secondly, remember in the example, I used the example of pregnancy - as a black or white thing(1)Therefore, we would most accurately say: If Mrs. Spit was pregnant, she would not go whitewater rafting.
Who Gets to Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award
Well, I'm very proud to say that everyone who did their grammar homework passed(2).
This week
- JuliaS
- SAHW
- Excavator
-Sweet Camden Lass
All get the button.
A friendly reminder - your button is only good for a week. If you don't do your homework, you don't get to keep the button. If you don't take the button down, your pants will fall down in public, you will break a nail and your car will begin to belch purple smoke. You may also come home to a mailbox stuffed with zucchini. Honest.
This Week's Lesson: Punctuation
Let's start by looking at the punctuation marks. I'm going to be hauling out the seminal work(3) on the subject, Mind the Stop: A Brief Guide to Punctuation by G.V. Carey. There are, according to my hero, Mr. Carey, two types of punctuation marks: the heavy ones and the light ones. Let's start with the heavy ones.
- The Period or Full Stop
- The Semi-Colon
- The Colon
- The Exclamation Mark
- The Question Mark
- Quotation Marks
The Period
Periods come at the end of sentences. Periods tell us that the sentence has ended.(4) We also use them to denote an abbreviation - for example, Mr.; B.Sc., A.M, P.M.
Mrs. Spit always uses full sentences in the A.M. Sometimes she forgets in the P.M.(5)
The Semi-Colon
A semi-colon separates independent clauses, when they are NOT joined by a co-ordinating conjunction (6). Yes, yes, I can hear you now. This is confusing. Essentially the rule is this: if you could use and, or, but, nor, yet and the like, remove that conjunction and plunk in your semi-colon. Not sure if you have an independent clause? Independent clauses must stand on their own, they should be able to be a sentence in their own right.
Mrs. Spit has a latte; she is not sharing it.
The Very Special, Very Important 'however' Rule.
This is a big deal in Mrs. Spit's world. She gets quite frenzied over it. When you use: however, on the other hand, therefore or the like, you punctuate in a particular way:
Mrs. Spit is a nice lady; however, when you use bad grammar, she becomes irate.
Did you notice the comma after however? Good. Don't forget to put it in.
The Colon
A colon introduces a list of items, can be used to amplify a statement, to introduce formal quotes (this isn't very common) and in a few other particular circumstances.
It is always correct to use a colon in the following circumstances:
- After a Salutation (Dear Ma'am:) - In time (8:40)
- Quoting Chapter and Verse (Romans 5: 1-5)
- To make the title of any book or paper sound more spiffy. See Mr. Carey's book above.
The Exclamation Mark
We use these when we are very excited. Unless you are a teenage girl, you only use 1.
I am quite firm on this!
The Question Mark
Question marks are only used after direct questions. A direct question is a question that demands an answer.
Mr. Spit, did you do your grammar homework?
Quotation Marks
Double: Double quotation marks enclose direct speech -when you are quoting someone else. Some writers may also put short stories, plays, articles and novella's in quotation marks. This is a matter of personal preference.
Single: We use single quotes to offset speech within a quote, to indicate a word is from another language, or to denote sarcasm -'that's nice'.
Mrs. Spit thinks some people are 'precious'. "Why God Bless your little heart" she says, when she meets them.
Your Homework
Punctuate this short paragraph correctly. (you will need to capitalize where appropriate!)
I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials i need milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project dear Mr Spit said did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors
Also: for those of you interested in the choose your own question option for 'Wednesday's are for Grammar', can you e-mail me your questions. Don't send them in the comments, as the comments will be full of people doing their homework, right class?
*****
(1) Although, in a world with a 2 week wait, paper pregnancies and the like, I'm not sure how exact this actually is. Perhaps I should have used living and deceased!
(2) Four people did their homework. Now class, this is not acceptable. Geohede had a by, what with the twins and all, but the rest of you? You had a 50% chance of getting it right. Mrs. Spit is extremely disappointed in you.
(3) You have a very dirty mind. Yes, you.
(4) A friendly reminder, you cannot force a sentence to be a sentence by starting with a capital. And ending with a period. It just doesn't work that way. We'll talk about what makes a sentence later.
(5) Did you note that I only used one period? This is a style thing. I find it confusing to use two periods, although technically that would be correct in this instance.
(6) Refresh your memory here.
Well everyone, your homework was to decide and make a good case for whether or not this sentence was punctuated correctly.
If Mrs. Spit were pregnant, she would not go whitewater rafting.
The correct answer is "was".
There were two big giveaways to this question. Firstly, I told you that I wasn't pregnant. Which meant that this was an indicative mood - a case of either or. Because you knew my state, you knew that I wasn't pregnant. Secondly, remember in the example, I used the example of pregnancy - as a black or white thing(1)Therefore, we would most accurately say: If Mrs. Spit was pregnant, she would not go whitewater rafting.
Who Gets to Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award
Well, I'm very proud to say that everyone who did their grammar homework passed(2).This week
- JuliaS
- SAHW
- Excavator
-Sweet Camden Lass
All get the button.
A friendly reminder - your button is only good for a week. If you don't do your homework, you don't get to keep the button. If you don't take the button down, your pants will fall down in public, you will break a nail and your car will begin to belch purple smoke. You may also come home to a mailbox stuffed with zucchini. Honest.
This Week's Lesson: Punctuation
Let's start by looking at the punctuation marks. I'm going to be hauling out the seminal work(3) on the subject, Mind the Stop: A Brief Guide to Punctuation by G.V. Carey. There are, according to my hero, Mr. Carey, two types of punctuation marks: the heavy ones and the light ones. Let's start with the heavy ones.
- The Period or Full Stop
- The Semi-Colon
- The Colon
- The Exclamation Mark
- The Question Mark
- Quotation Marks
The Period
Periods come at the end of sentences. Periods tell us that the sentence has ended.(4) We also use them to denote an abbreviation - for example, Mr.; B.Sc., A.M, P.M.
Mrs. Spit always uses full sentences in the A.M. Sometimes she forgets in the P.M.(5)
The Semi-Colon
A semi-colon separates independent clauses, when they are NOT joined by a co-ordinating conjunction (6). Yes, yes, I can hear you now. This is confusing. Essentially the rule is this: if you could use and, or, but, nor, yet and the like, remove that conjunction and plunk in your semi-colon. Not sure if you have an independent clause? Independent clauses must stand on their own, they should be able to be a sentence in their own right.
Mrs. Spit has a latte; she is not sharing it.
The Very Special, Very Important 'however' Rule.
This is a big deal in Mrs. Spit's world. She gets quite frenzied over it. When you use: however, on the other hand, therefore or the like, you punctuate in a particular way:
Mrs. Spit is a nice lady; however, when you use bad grammar, she becomes irate.
Did you notice the comma after however? Good. Don't forget to put it in.
The Colon
A colon introduces a list of items, can be used to amplify a statement, to introduce formal quotes (this isn't very common) and in a few other particular circumstances.
It is always correct to use a colon in the following circumstances:
- After a Salutation (Dear Ma'am:) - In time (8:40)
- Quoting Chapter and Verse (Romans 5: 1-5)
- To make the title of any book or paper sound more spiffy. See Mr. Carey's book above.
The Exclamation Mark
We use these when we are very excited. Unless you are a teenage girl, you only use 1.
I am quite firm on this!
The Question Mark
Question marks are only used after direct questions. A direct question is a question that demands an answer.
Mr. Spit, did you do your grammar homework?
Quotation Marks
Double: Double quotation marks enclose direct speech -when you are quoting someone else. Some writers may also put short stories, plays, articles and novella's in quotation marks. This is a matter of personal preference.
Single: We use single quotes to offset speech within a quote, to indicate a word is from another language, or to denote sarcasm -'that's nice'.
Mrs. Spit thinks some people are 'precious'. "Why God Bless your little heart" she says, when she meets them.
Your Homework
Punctuate this short paragraph correctly. (you will need to capitalize where appropriate!)
I need to go grocery shopping for a few essentials i need milk eggs bread and a skein of 100 percent cashmere for a new project dear Mr Spit said did you think I wouldn't notice the addition of your essential cashmere safeway doesn't sell wool and I have told the local yarn store to ban you from their doors
Also: for those of you interested in the choose your own question option for 'Wednesday's are for Grammar', can you e-mail me your questions. Don't send them in the comments, as the comments will be full of people doing their homework, right class?
*****
(1) Although, in a world with a 2 week wait, paper pregnancies and the like, I'm not sure how exact this actually is. Perhaps I should have used living and deceased!
(2) Four people did their homework. Now class, this is not acceptable. Geohede had a by, what with the twins and all, but the rest of you? You had a 50% chance of getting it right. Mrs. Spit is extremely disappointed in you.
(3) You have a very dirty mind. Yes, you.
(4) A friendly reminder, you cannot force a sentence to be a sentence by starting with a capital. And ending with a period. It just doesn't work that way. We'll talk about what makes a sentence later.
(5) Did you note that I only used one period? This is a style thing. I find it confusing to use two periods, although technically that would be correct in this instance.
(6) Refresh your memory here.
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Well everyone:
Your homework was to determine the parts of speech in this sentence.
Mrs. Spit was gardening quietly in her back garden, working quickly to finish the odious task. "Ewww", she screamed. "That beetle is ugly, disgusting and gross".
Let's see how you did:
Mrs. Spit (Proper Noun) was (Verb) gardening (Verb) quietly (Adverb) in (Preposition) her(Pronoun) back (Adjective) garden (Noun), working(Verb) quickly (Adverb) to finish (Infinitive Verb) the (Preposition) odious(Adjective) task(Noun). "Ewww"(Interjection), she (Pronoun)screamed(Verb). "That (Adjective) beetle (Noun) is (Verb) ugly(Adjective), disgusting (Adjective) and (Conjunction) gross (Adjective)".
Who Gets To Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award:
Dreams Come True
Sam
Julia S
Alicia
Jamie D
Excavator
Sweet Camden Lass
We will give honourable mention to Geohede, who did not complete the homework, but gave us two very adorable and healthy twins named Saag and Naan. Welcome Earthside, wee ones.
Just a few reminders. A number of you counted "back" from back garden as a preposition. And I can see why, but a preposition tells us the relationship between something, and an adjective modifies the noun. In this case, we are modifying the word garden, by telling the reader that Mrs. Spit is in the back garden. If we said Mrs. Spit is back, in the garden, back would indeed be a preposition, because we are telling someone that there is a back, and Mrs. Spit is in it. This is different than telling the reader that there is a back garden. It's tricky, I'll admit. If you don't understand why you got something wrong, send me an e-mail, and I will send you the worksheet, with the sentence diagrammed.
Today's Lesson:
Excavator asked a great question a few weeks ago. Specifically she asked:
I have a difficult time trying to use language to describe parts of language--I get muddled. What about this sentence?"I wish I wasn't that kind of person...I'd be much more fun if I was more adventurous..." I originally wrote it as "I wish I *were*..." "I'd be much more fun if I *were* more adventurous..."
So class, should Excavator write if I was, or if I were? While it sounds as if the two phrases should be interchangeable, they actually aren't. To explain why, I need to explain subjunctive and indicative moods. (1)
Now a subjunctive mood in writing is a verb that is used in such a way that it designates a hypothesis, a possibility or a suggestion. It does not designate fact. In other words, things may be one way, they may be another. We can't be sure. In cases of subjunctive, we use "were" to denote that we aren't sure of the state of things.
An indicative mood, on the other hand, is much more clear. Things are either black or white, this way or the other. You are either pregnant or not. In cases of indicative, we use "was", to indicate that we are sure of things.
When we look at Excavator's question, we need to determine if she is in fact adventurous, or if she might be adventurous, could be adventurous, but we can't be sure. (2) In other words, do we have a subjunctive or an indicative?
Looking at the sentence closely, we see that Excavator is expressing a definite cause and effect relationship. She is saying that she would be much more fun, if only she was absolutely more adventurous. She's not saying that she might be more adventurous, or she might not be; she's saying that she would like to be, and that's an absolute (3).
So, in answer to Excavator's question, the answer is:
"I wish I wasn't that kind of person...I'd be much more fun if I was more adventurous..."
To give you another example, I could say:
"If I were rich, I could buy all the wool I want." I might be rich, I might not(4), we can't be sure.
Homework:
Now, your homework this week is two fold. The first is to build your most compelling case about whether this statement is right or wrong:
If Mrs. Spit were pregnant, she would not go whitewater rafting. (5)
The next part is to pick from one of the options on the poll listed on the side. Tell me, would you like to:
(1)And I can do this because I went back to my grammar books to learn about them.
(2) And you thought grammar and introspection weren't related!
(3) In the sense that she absolutely wants to be more adventurous. I happen to think that anyone who goes white water rafting with children is very adventurous indeed. But that's just my opinion.
(4) I'm not. Just in case you were wondering.
(5) See above.
Your homework was to determine the parts of speech in this sentence.
Mrs. Spit was gardening quietly in her back garden, working quickly to finish the odious task. "Ewww", she screamed. "That beetle is ugly, disgusting and gross".
Let's see how you did:
Mrs. Spit (Proper Noun) was (Verb) gardening (Verb) quietly (Adverb) in (Preposition) her(Pronoun) back (Adjective) garden (Noun), working(Verb) quickly (Adverb) to finish (Infinitive Verb) the (Preposition) odious(Adjective) task(Noun). "Ewww"(Interjection), she (Pronoun)screamed(Verb). "That (Adjective) beetle (Noun) is (Verb) ugly(Adjective), disgusting (Adjective) and (Conjunction) gross (Adjective)".
Who Gets To Post This Week's Coveted Grammar Award:
Dreams Come True
Sam
Julia S
Alicia
Jamie D
Excavator
Sweet Camden Lass
We will give honourable mention to Geohede, who did not complete the homework, but gave us two very adorable and healthy twins named Saag and Naan. Welcome Earthside, wee ones.
Just a few reminders. A number of you counted "back" from back garden as a preposition. And I can see why, but a preposition tells us the relationship between something, and an adjective modifies the noun. In this case, we are modifying the word garden, by telling the reader that Mrs. Spit is in the back garden. If we said Mrs. Spit is back, in the garden, back would indeed be a preposition, because we are telling someone that there is a back, and Mrs. Spit is in it. This is different than telling the reader that there is a back garden. It's tricky, I'll admit. If you don't understand why you got something wrong, send me an e-mail, and I will send you the worksheet, with the sentence diagrammed.
Today's Lesson:
Excavator asked a great question a few weeks ago. Specifically she asked:
I have a difficult time trying to use language to describe parts of language--I get muddled. What about this sentence?"I wish I wasn't that kind of person...I'd be much more fun if I was more adventurous..." I originally wrote it as "I wish I *were*..." "I'd be much more fun if I *were* more adventurous..."
So class, should Excavator write if I was, or if I were? While it sounds as if the two phrases should be interchangeable, they actually aren't. To explain why, I need to explain subjunctive and indicative moods. (1)
Now a subjunctive mood in writing is a verb that is used in such a way that it designates a hypothesis, a possibility or a suggestion. It does not designate fact. In other words, things may be one way, they may be another. We can't be sure. In cases of subjunctive, we use "were" to denote that we aren't sure of the state of things.
An indicative mood, on the other hand, is much more clear. Things are either black or white, this way or the other. You are either pregnant or not. In cases of indicative, we use "was", to indicate that we are sure of things.
When we look at Excavator's question, we need to determine if she is in fact adventurous, or if she might be adventurous, could be adventurous, but we can't be sure. (2) In other words, do we have a subjunctive or an indicative?
Looking at the sentence closely, we see that Excavator is expressing a definite cause and effect relationship. She is saying that she would be much more fun, if only she was absolutely more adventurous. She's not saying that she might be more adventurous, or she might not be; she's saying that she would like to be, and that's an absolute (3).
So, in answer to Excavator's question, the answer is:
"I wish I wasn't that kind of person...I'd be much more fun if I was more adventurous..."
To give you another example, I could say:
"If I were rich, I could buy all the wool I want." I might be rich, I might not(4), we can't be sure.
Homework:
Now, your homework this week is two fold. The first is to build your most compelling case about whether this statement is right or wrong:
If Mrs. Spit were pregnant, she would not go whitewater rafting. (5)
The next part is to pick from one of the options on the poll listed on the side. Tell me, would you like to:
- Learn about apostrophes
- Learn how to use English grammar to make yourself seem clever
- Learn about punctuation
- Submit a question about grammar
- Please Mrs. Spit, we love you, but we hate the grammar. Please start posting about gnome races or growing kudzu or canning lima beans on Wednesdays.
(1)And I can do this because I went back to my grammar books to learn about them.
(2) And you thought grammar and introspection weren't related!
(3) In the sense that she absolutely wants to be more adventurous. I happen to think that anyone who goes white water rafting with children is very adventurous indeed. But that's just my opinion.
(4) I'm not. Just in case you were wondering.
(5) See above.
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Last Week's Homework
Well then class, your homework was to identify the verb, the adjective and the noun (including proper nouns). Let's see how you did.
Mrs. Spit went to the amazing knitting store.
Verb: went
Noun: knitting store
Proper Noun: Mrs. Spit
Adjective: amazing.
So, we have an award here at Mrs. Spit's. A special award, created by my very best friend Gen, using all her graphic arts skills, just for those who did their homework.
Those Receiving the Shiny Grammar Apple Whis Week (to put on their blog and receive approbation and honours):
- Sweet Camden Lass(Who gets bonus points for also identifying the subject and predicate)
- Alicia (Who does not suck at this grammar stuff)
- Geohede (Who is exempt from homework this week, if the twins come before next Tuesday)
- Just Me (Who made up her own example, and got that correct!)
- Natalie (Who also got the proper noun!)
- Excavator (Who asks really hard questions)
Receiving Honourable Mention:
JuliaS - Who did not do the homework, but did help excavator write code, in addition to parsing the sentence.
- JamieD - Who gave me a sparkly, shiny award, that I have been remiss in saying thank you for!
This Week's Lesson:
Adverbs
An adverb modifies the verb. It limits or bounds or modifies the verb, telling us more about the action of the sentence. This is different from and adjective, because an adjective modifies the noun, not the verb. Adverbs can also modify the entire clause, as I will show in example 2.
Mrs. Spit speaks quickly - in this sentence the quickly modifies the act of speaking. You get more information about the verb. Mrs. Spit doesn't just speak, she speaks quickly.
Mrs. Spit is an unusually brilliant knitter. Mrs. Spit doesn't just knit, but she's unusually brilliant at it. The unusually doesn't actually modify the is, it modifies the whole last clause of "brilliant knitter".
Did you notice something about the adverbs? Go back and look, we'll wait.
That's right, adverbs most often end in -ly.
Prepositions
Prepositions (not propositions!) make the world go 'round. A preposition tells us the relationship between the object and another clause in the sentence. The preposition tells us if something is higher or lower or up or down or in front of or behind something else. You probably know a lot of them on this list(1):
Well then class, your homework was to identify the verb, the adjective and the noun (including proper nouns). Let's see how you did.
Mrs. Spit went to the amazing knitting store.
Verb: went
Noun: knitting store
Proper Noun: Mrs. Spit
Adjective: amazing.
So, we have an award here at Mrs. Spit's. A special award, created by my very best friend Gen, using all her graphic arts skills, just for those who did their homework.
Those Receiving the Shiny Grammar Apple Whis Week (to put on their blog and receive approbation and honours):
- Sweet Camden Lass(Who gets bonus points for also identifying the subject and predicate)- Alicia (Who does not suck at this grammar stuff)
- Geohede (Who is exempt from homework this week, if the twins come before next Tuesday)
- Just Me (Who made up her own example, and got that correct!)
- Natalie (Who also got the proper noun!)
- Excavator (Who asks really hard questions)
Receiving Honourable Mention:
JuliaS - Who did not do the homework, but did help excavator write code, in addition to parsing the sentence.
- JamieD - Who gave me a sparkly, shiny award, that I have been remiss in saying thank you for!
This Week's Lesson:
Adverbs
An adverb modifies the verb. It limits or bounds or modifies the verb, telling us more about the action of the sentence. This is different from and adjective, because an adjective modifies the noun, not the verb. Adverbs can also modify the entire clause, as I will show in example 2.
Mrs. Spit speaks quickly - in this sentence the quickly modifies the act of speaking. You get more information about the verb. Mrs. Spit doesn't just speak, she speaks quickly.
Mrs. Spit is an unusually brilliant knitter. Mrs. Spit doesn't just knit, but she's unusually brilliant at it. The unusually doesn't actually modify the is, it modifies the whole last clause of "brilliant knitter".
Did you notice something about the adverbs? Go back and look, we'll wait.
That's right, adverbs most often end in -ly.
Prepositions
Prepositions (not propositions!) make the world go 'round. A preposition tells us the relationship between the object and another clause in the sentence. The preposition tells us if something is higher or lower or up or down or in front of or behind something else. You probably know a lot of them on this list(1):
- above/below
- for/against
- in/out
- before/after
- up/down
- during/after
- within/without
- to
- at
- except
- until
- but
Conjunctions
A conjunction is a word that joins other words or groups of words.(2) There are two types of conjunctions: co-ordinating and subordinating. A co-ordinating conjunction joins words of equal rank.
Mrs. Spit is smart and funny. Note that both ideas are equally important in the sentence, and the "and" joins them.
Common Co-Ordinating Conjunctions include: and, but, or, nor and for.
A subordinating conjunction introduces a clause, or part of a sentence that depends on or is less important than the other clause or part of the sentence.
Mrs. Spit was knitting while she was stressed out. Note, the knitting is more important, it happens because of the second thing - the stressed out.
Common Subordinating Conjunctions include: If, whether, while, unless, although, as, before, after and until.
Interjections
An interjection is an exclamatory word, thrown in a sentence. Adjectives and adverbs often become interjections. Think of words like: yes!, Hey, Ouch!, Why?, Hooray.
Ouch! Yelled Mrs. Spit as she dropped the anvil on her foot. The interjection is Ouch!
Expletives
This is going to break your heart. I am not talking about the salacious words you never see used here at Mrs. Spit's. An expletive is using the words there or it, and combining them with the infinitive "to be". In a sense, the expletive postpones the event until another time.
There will be another grammar column next week for you to study. There will be is an expletive.
Expletives are generally not the best English. It is usually better to use more direct wording. In the sentence above, I should have said:
Please study next week's grammar column.
Homework
Mrs. Spit was gardening quietly in her back garden, working quickly to finish the odious task. "Ewww", she screamed. "That beetle is ugly, disgusting and gross".
Your job is to find:
Verb
Noun
Pronoun
Adjective
Adverb
Preposition
Conjunction
Interjection
******
(1) - Umm, lot's more than this folks, but my hands are getting tired.
(2) Conjunctions are real followers.
Was and Were
Ahh, Excavator, God bless her, has asked a good question about was and were. And I don't know the answer off the top of my head. Go and see the comments on Wednesday's grammar lesson.
I am going to research subjunctive and conjunctive something or other's. And I will get back to you. Honest.
Just not right now.
I am going to research subjunctive and conjunctive something or other's. And I will get back to you. Honest.
Just not right now.
Wednesday's are for Grammar
Homework
Now class, did you all do your homework? Remember - our example was:
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit, is a really good grammar teacher.
And you were to find the subject and the predicate? Let's check your answers.
The Simple Subject:
Mrs. Spit - It's Mrs. Spit that is the really good grammar teacher.
The Compound Subject:
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit - smarty pants is an adjective that describes Mrs. Spit.
The Simple Predicate:
is - remember the predicate describes the actions, the experience or the state of being of the subject. In this case, Mrs. Spit has the nominative of being a really good grammar teacher.
The Compound Predicate:
Is a really good grammar teacher. The compound describes the rest of the state of being.
Today's Lesson - Parts of Speech
In this lesson you get to learn "those big grammar words". All words form a part of speech. Every word in a sentence should have a part of speech associated with it. So, the basic parts of speech are:
A verb expresses an action, an occurrence or a state of being.
- Mrs. Spit dances - what is she doing - she's dancing.
- Mrs. Spit became grumpy - what state of being is she - she's grumpy. Remember - the grumpy is just a description of my state of being. It's the became that is the action.
- Mrs. Spit was hit by a flying baseball. This sentence is a bit trickier. Many of you might select flying as the verb, but remember, the flying describes the baseball, not the subject of the sentence - Mrs. Spit. In this case the verb is was. Was is a form of verb called a linking verb. Linking Verbs connect our subject with the words that describe the subject. (also called a subject complement).
There are also axillary or helping verbs (doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy, there are verbs that want to help you!) An axillary verb is a form of one of the following verbs(1):
A noun is a person, place or thing or idea.
- Mrs. Spit drank whisky - the noun is the whisky(2).
- Mrs. Spit is Mr. Spit's wife - this sentence has two nouns. Wife and Mr. Spit. Mr. Spit is a proper noun, meaning that it refers to a specific person, place or thing. We always capitalize proper nouns.
- She is a gardener. Can anyone tell me what the noun is? (Kuri, I'm looking at you!). That's right, there's two. Gardener is a noun, and so is "she". She is a pronoun.
A pronoun is a word or group of words that replaces a noun. If you replace your kid's name with he or him; or when you are really mad at your neighbour, and you call him a womble (3), you are using a pronoun. (4)
Adjectives
An adjective is one of the simpler things to find in a sentence. It describes the verb or modifies it.
- The very pretty Mrs. Spit is a good wife. And the adjectives are (I'm looking at you Mr. Spit). Yes, that's right, very pretty and good wife. The very pretty describes the subject, and the good wife describe my state of being.
There is also a set of adjectives that are called limiting adjectives. They describe the relationship to something.
- That is Mrs. Spit's car. In this case, the "that" is a limiting adjective. It describes a particular car as belonging to Mrs. Spit. (5). For those of you who remember yesterday, Kendra's use of whose was also an adjective. (Point 3)
- Few women today are like Mrs. spit. In this case, we are limiting the noun - women - with the idea that Mrs. Spit is a one of a kind (Few).
Next week, we'll talk about
(1) Yeah, ok, there are many axillary verbs. And I'm not going to list them all. Move on.
(2) Actually to be specific, I drink bourbon. Maker's Mark. And you get bonus points if you can tell me whether the name of the bourbon is a noun or a proper noun.
(3) A la Jeremy Clarkson, from Top Gear.
(4) See, and you are just thinking you were being an awful neighbour - and maybe you are, but you are being grammatically correct while you do so.
(5) You might also be able to figure it out by the plethora of dog hair in it.
Now class, did you all do your homework? Remember - our example was:
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit, is a really good grammar teacher.
And you were to find the subject and the predicate? Let's check your answers.
The Simple Subject:
Mrs. Spit - It's Mrs. Spit that is the really good grammar teacher.
The Compound Subject:
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit - smarty pants is an adjective that describes Mrs. Spit.
The Simple Predicate:
is - remember the predicate describes the actions, the experience or the state of being of the subject. In this case, Mrs. Spit has the nominative of being a really good grammar teacher.
The Compound Predicate:
Is a really good grammar teacher. The compound describes the rest of the state of being.
Today's Lesson - Parts of Speech
In this lesson you get to learn "those big grammar words". All words form a part of speech. Every word in a sentence should have a part of speech associated with it. So, the basic parts of speech are:
- Verb
- Noun
- Pronoun
- Adjective
A verb expresses an action, an occurrence or a state of being.
- Mrs. Spit dances - what is she doing - she's dancing.
- Mrs. Spit became grumpy - what state of being is she - she's grumpy. Remember - the grumpy is just a description of my state of being. It's the became that is the action.
- Mrs. Spit was hit by a flying baseball. This sentence is a bit trickier. Many of you might select flying as the verb, but remember, the flying describes the baseball, not the subject of the sentence - Mrs. Spit. In this case the verb is was. Was is a form of verb called a linking verb. Linking Verbs connect our subject with the words that describe the subject. (also called a subject complement).
There are also axillary or helping verbs (doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy, there are verbs that want to help you!) An axillary verb is a form of one of the following verbs(1):
- be
- do
- have
- can
- may
- will
A noun is a person, place or thing or idea.
- Mrs. Spit drank whisky - the noun is the whisky(2).
- Mrs. Spit is Mr. Spit's wife - this sentence has two nouns. Wife and Mr. Spit. Mr. Spit is a proper noun, meaning that it refers to a specific person, place or thing. We always capitalize proper nouns.
- She is a gardener. Can anyone tell me what the noun is? (Kuri, I'm looking at you!). That's right, there's two. Gardener is a noun, and so is "she". She is a pronoun.
A pronoun is a word or group of words that replaces a noun. If you replace your kid's name with he or him; or when you are really mad at your neighbour, and you call him a womble (3), you are using a pronoun. (4)
Adjectives
An adjective is one of the simpler things to find in a sentence. It describes the verb or modifies it.
- The very pretty Mrs. Spit is a good wife. And the adjectives are (I'm looking at you Mr. Spit). Yes, that's right, very pretty and good wife. The very pretty describes the subject, and the good wife describe my state of being.
There is also a set of adjectives that are called limiting adjectives. They describe the relationship to something.
- That is Mrs. Spit's car. In this case, the "that" is a limiting adjective. It describes a particular car as belonging to Mrs. Spit. (5). For those of you who remember yesterday, Kendra's use of whose was also an adjective. (Point 3)
- Few women today are like Mrs. spit. In this case, we are limiting the noun - women - with the idea that Mrs. Spit is a one of a kind (Few).
Next week, we'll talk about
- Adverbs
- Prepositions
- Conjunctions
- Interjections
- Expletives (I expect you to get a 100% on this section)
Your Homework
Mrs. Spit went to the amazing knitting store.
Find the Verb, the Adjective, the Noun (Including proper nouns).
And really class, do try harder to get your homework done.
*****(1) Yeah, ok, there are many axillary verbs. And I'm not going to list them all. Move on.
(2) Actually to be specific, I drink bourbon. Maker's Mark. And you get bonus points if you can tell me whether the name of the bourbon is a noun or a proper noun.
(3) A la Jeremy Clarkson, from Top Gear.
(4) See, and you are just thinking you were being an awful neighbour - and maybe you are, but you are being grammatically correct while you do so.
(5) You might also be able to figure it out by the plethora of dog hair in it.
Wednesday's are for Grammar
About a year ago, I found myself explaining to my supervisor that "that word is an adverb. It must end in -ly. I'm sorry, but that's the grammar rule".
Her response: "Don't use big grammar words with me."
We had another discussion the other day, supervisor and I. I know that possessives with an 's' are complicated. It's just that I think that you should put your big girl you-know-what's on, and deal with them.
I'm maybe a little grumpy. So I decided, because I can't teach her grammar, I'll teach all of you. Because really, it's not about education, it's about power and control and frustration. And I'm sorry, but until I get it out of my system, well,
there will be grammar lessons.
You might learn things. At the least you will be able to drop "gerund" into a sentence and amaze your friends and astound your family.
Today's Lesson:
Subjects and Predicates
Really, they aren't scary, class. Honest. They are even fun (1). They form the backbone of every sentance. And every complete sentance has a subject (or maybe two) and a predicate.
So, what is a subject?
A subject is the thing(2) in a sentence that takes the action - you could call it a receiver. It acts, is described or is acted upon. You could call it an actor too. It's what or who the sentance is about.
So, in the sentence: "Mrs. Spit was grumpy with her boss."
Can anyone tell me what the subject is? Anyone? (I'm looking at you LoriBeth!)
Yes, that's right. Mrs. Spit is the subject. She's the person who's acting, or in this case, feeling.
Ok then, if you have subjects down, what is a predicate?
A predicate is the part of the sentence that takes the action, the description, or is acted upon. It tells you what is being done to the subject, it describes the subject, or it tells you what the subject did. Back to our example:
Mrs. Spit was grumpy with her boss.
What's the object?(3) Anyone? Class? (I'm looking at you now Aunt Becky)
Yes, that's right - "was "
was tells you that I, the subject, experienced feelings of grumpiness.
There are simple subjects (Mrs. Spit) and compound subjects (Mr and Mrs. Spit or the very pretty Mrs. Spit)
There are simple predicates (was) and compound predicates (was grumpy).
So, we have the subject - what or who the sentance is about. And we have the predicate, the information about what the subject is feeling, experiencing or having happen to them.
Your homework:
*Insert groan here*. Find the subject and the predicate of the sentence, and identify if they are compound or simple subjects and predicates, in the comments.
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit, is a really good grammar teacher.
A really big star for all of you who get it right. And, as an additional bonus, if there is a grammar question you have always had, feel free to ask away. It can be next week's lesson.
*****
(1) ok, I'm exaggerating, maybe just a bit.
(2) this is highly technical grammar language. We will talk about nouns and verbs at a later date.
(3) Yes, you get extra points if you tell me the object is that Mrs. Spit should drink more whisky sours. Extra extra points if you send her whisky.
Her response: "Don't use big grammar words with me."
Gerund. Possessive. Ampersand. Predicate. Appositive.
Subjunctive voice. Co-ordinating clause.
We had another discussion the other day, supervisor and I. I know that possessives with an 's' are complicated. It's just that I think that you should put your big girl you-know-what's on, and deal with them.
I'm maybe a little grumpy. So I decided, because I can't teach her grammar, I'll teach all of you. Because really, it's not about education, it's about power and control and frustration. And I'm sorry, but until I get it out of my system, well,
there will be grammar lessons.
You might learn things. At the least you will be able to drop "gerund" into a sentence and amaze your friends and astound your family.
Today's Lesson:
Subjects and Predicates
Really, they aren't scary, class. Honest. They are even fun (1). They form the backbone of every sentance. And every complete sentance has a subject (or maybe two) and a predicate.
So, what is a subject?
A subject is the thing(2) in a sentence that takes the action - you could call it a receiver. It acts, is described or is acted upon. You could call it an actor too. It's what or who the sentance is about.
So, in the sentence: "Mrs. Spit was grumpy with her boss."
Can anyone tell me what the subject is? Anyone? (I'm looking at you LoriBeth!)
Yes, that's right. Mrs. Spit is the subject. She's the person who's acting, or in this case, feeling.
Ok then, if you have subjects down, what is a predicate?
A predicate is the part of the sentence that takes the action, the description, or is acted upon. It tells you what is being done to the subject, it describes the subject, or it tells you what the subject did. Back to our example:
Mrs. Spit was grumpy with her boss.
What's the object?(3) Anyone? Class? (I'm looking at you now Aunt Becky)
Yes, that's right - "was "
was tells you that I, the subject, experienced feelings of grumpiness.
There are simple subjects (Mrs. Spit) and compound subjects (Mr and Mrs. Spit or the very pretty Mrs. Spit)
There are simple predicates (was) and compound predicates (was grumpy).
So, we have the subject - what or who the sentance is about. And we have the predicate, the information about what the subject is feeling, experiencing or having happen to them.
Your homework:
*Insert groan here*. Find the subject and the predicate of the sentence, and identify if they are compound or simple subjects and predicates, in the comments.
The smarty-pants, Mrs. Spit, is a really good grammar teacher.
A really big star for all of you who get it right. And, as an additional bonus, if there is a grammar question you have always had, feel free to ask away. It can be next week's lesson.
*****
(1) ok, I'm exaggerating, maybe just a bit.
(2) this is highly technical grammar language. We will talk about nouns and verbs at a later date.
(3) Yes, you get extra points if you tell me the object is that Mrs. Spit should drink more whisky sours. Extra extra points if you send her whisky.
