Hot Dogs

I went to a volunteer thing on New Year's, raising money for a friend's pre-school. She asked if I was going to blog about the experience, and I said yes.

Which leaves me wondering what to blog about.

The T-Shirt Promise
I think it all began when she sent out the information about the event. We would be in a picnic shelter, with a very large fire. Apparently dear readers, we would be so warm we would be running around in our t-shirts. I thought this sounded, well a bit strange, given that it was to be -30C (-4F), and I kept thinking that this seemed a far fetched claim.
Perhaps, unsurprisingly, I spent no time in a t-shirt. Well, no, that's not quite accurate. I was wearing a T-shirt. It's just that I was wearing 4 layers over that. We teased said organizer, leaving her to splutter that she was told t-shirts. C. in case I forgot to mention it - you know, because my brain was froze- I think, just maybe, they lied to you. Just a tiny bit. But, as interesting as the t-shirt assertion is, there really isn't enough of the story to write a blog entry about.

People Aren't Just People
I could tell you that people who live in so-called bedroom communities are, well, different than those who live in the inner city. But frankly, this just seems to be a stupid thing to say, unless I can call out exactly what those differences are. And I have a post about stopping and staring, but it's not quite ready to be teased out of my brain.

I could, perhaps, tell you the story of the hot dogs. The $1 hot dogs. And tell you all of the snappy retorts I wanted to come back with.

Yes, that's what I will do. I will tell you about selling hot dogs for a dollar.

"Are they organic?"
It's a hot dog. By it's very nature, it came, mostly - I think, from animals. Yes, definitely. There were animals involved at some point. I'm almost sure of it. If you would like to be more precise, they have carbon in them. Probably to a greater amount on the surface. I remember the edict from 1st year University Chemistry - Things That Have Carbon in Them are Organic. Yep, absolutely, they're organic. I think.

"Do they have trans-fats?"
Oh, it's a hot dog. A generic hot dog. The ingredients are (mostly?) written on the side of the plastic wrapper. I would say there is a distinct possibility that the trans-fats will be the healthiest thing in the hot dog.

"What's in them?"
Now, I'm not sure about you, but I learned really early in my life that there were a few questions it was better not to ask. If gravity really works, when to do the hoke- pokey, and what's really in a hot dog. What were you doing when you were supposed to be learning this lesson?

"Were they humanely killed?"
Funny you should ask. We went to the free range hot dog farm just this morning. The rancher wandered around, he asked all the hot dogs, and only those that volunteered became your dinner. Now, you really shouldn't ask about the ketchup. You don't want to know about the tomatoes.

"Are they fair trade?"
Well, we went to the grocer free range hot dog farmer. We gave him a surprisingly small amount of money. He gave us 200lbs of hot dogs. No one called the police, the sheriff, their mummy or their therapist. I'd say they're fair trade.

"Are you qualified to cook those?"
Well, let's see. I have a degree with a double major in economics and political science. I am a great gardener and a pretty good cook. Ok, I'll admit it, I'm not the greatest housekeeper, but I'm a pretty darn good knitter. Mr. Spit has a degree in psychology, and he used to know locations of nuclear subs (no, really, when he was in the military he did). They let him build bridges, as long as he gets the right permits. We make pretty good money, and we haven't declared bankruptcy. Neither of us are in jail. Are you qualified to eat a hot dog? What if you choke?