Saturday Quotes

Once again we find ourselves enmeshed in the Holiday Season, that very special time of year when we join with our loved ones in sharing centuries-old traditions such as trying to find a parking space at the mall. We traditionally do this in my family by driving around the parking lot until we see a shopper emerge from the mall, then we follow her, in very much the same spirit as the Three Wise Men, who 2,000 years ago followed a star, week after week, until it led them to a parking space.
- Dave Barry

I woke up from the most horrifying dream that it was Christmas Eve, and I had done no Christmas Shopping. I was tearing through a mall, buying random crap for people I don't even like much. Thankfully, parking was not a feature of my dream.